Roll down the window for some fresh air

It’s nearly December in Michigan — it certainly feels that way at any rate — and I saw something pretty disturbing today on my way home for lunch.

The temperature outside was maybe — just maybe — thirty degrees. And there were people driving around with their windows down.

I know. Crazy, huh?

Just wait. It gets crazier.

There was a specific reason why these nut jobs had their windows down. They wanted to get some fresh air — because they were smoking.

I knooooow. Crazy.

It’s getting so rare to see smokers out and about that I find myself mildly surprised when I run into one. Well, not actually “run into” one. That would be bad. I might get burnt by their nasty butt. But you know what I mean.

I think I’ve gotten spoiled by the lack of smokers in my life. I only have a handful of friends who still do it plus one sibling. Most of the restaurants around here have gone to smoke-free. Very few in my work environment smoke or, if they do, they don’t actually do it at work. It’s really quite nice. And, as I said, I’ve become a bit spoilt by it.

Mind you, I’m not complaining. Far from it. I just don’t get opening the window in below-freezing weather to enjoy a couple puffs of less-than-fresh air.

Just Because I’m Paranoid...

Doesn’t mean that my house isn’t out to get me.

Seriously. I’m endeavoring to be a good homeowner and do nice things for and around my house but I get the distinct impression that it’s trying to kill me.

Okay. Perhaps not. But I have had three potentially very bad things in my house that a) should have probably been caught during the inspection and b) could have ended badly for me and, quite possibly, my neighbors.

The first was the discovery that the outlet for the stove was wired quite badly and barely made a solid connection. This fire hazard was discovered when the stove/oven was producing heat without any semblance of consistency. I am grateful to the nice man from Consumers Energy who went above and beyond the appliance service call and took care of the issue.

The second potential hazard was the slow gas leak that had been, apparently, present from the day I moved into the house in June until I discovered the leak and called out Consumers Energy on a very cold and very late Saturday night in February. At first glance it was discovered that the natural gas lines to the furnace and water heater were sealed with plumber’s tape — great for water but not so much for gas. These slow leaks were responsible for the always present smell that I had chalked up to “creepy basement smell.“ I was fortunate, really, that an elbow joint had actually cracked and was feeding large amounts of gas into the house else I probably never would have noticed the smell in a high enough concentration to bring it to the attention of the professionals.

The third threat was discovered just this week. My water heater is very noisy when warming the water and I’ve become somewhat used to the banging and clanging that rings out after I run the dishwasher or take a hot shower. It was suggested that draining and flushing the water heater would get rid of any sediment in the tank that may be responsible for the noise. So, during the day-long household maintenance extravaganza mentioned previously in the “Superfriends” post, John and Dave drained and flushed the water heater. A week later I discovered that the bucket we’d left beneath the nozzle as a precautionary measure was full of water. I got ahold of John and we came up with a couple of theories based upon internet research and the limitless expertise of our handy-friend Ryan. All of our theories pointed to the less-than-positive prospect that the pressure release valve had issues. And, boy, did it ever. The pressure release valve wasn’t in any condition to release anything as it was being choked with calcium and lime deposits. John and Dave, being extraordinary people, drained the water heater again, gave it another flush, chipped away the calcium and lime and replaced the pressure release valve. Just so everyone knows, the pressure release valve on your water heater should be checked at least once a year and, yes, when you open the valve something -- water, steam, air -- should come out of it. If nothing comes out, call a handy friend or professional and get it taken care of. There are videos online (here’s one from Myth Busters) of exploding water heaters and they ain’t pretty.

Just as with the stove not working properly and the broken elbow pipe, I am blessedly fortunate that the water heater started leaking else the bad outlet, slow leaks and none-releasing pressure valve would never have been corrected. It is often said that the Lord works in mysterious ways or, as I often say, the Universe has a sense of humor and nothing drives these points home more than dodging a bullet you didn’t even know was being shot at you.

Product Endorsement: Proactive

Here’s another product endorsement that I’m not getting any money from.

For anyone who’s known me any significant length of time, you know that I’ve had a bit of an issue with acne. I actually went through my formative years with relatively blemish-free skin. It wasn’t until late junior year of college that my face erupted into uncontrollable volcanic chains. A former roommate thought it served me right as she had suffered a long battle with facial blemishes while I would quite often go without washing my face before bed and then slather perfumed and oily lotion on while she was trapped in a nightly routine of special medicated wash and moisturizer.

I’ve tried a couple of different products and practices over the years to treat the angry and bumpy splotches on my face and have finally found a reliable companion in Proactive Solution. I use the three-punch skin care system nightly (they recommend once to twice a day but my skin dried out with morning and night washes) and have to say that I’m much prettier than I used to be. I still get the odd pimple or two (there’s a nice dot forming in the middle of my forehead that I’m blaming on Thanksgiving) but they seem to be isolated incidents rather than the small colonies that had previously settled on my chin and surrounding areas.

Though I’ve been warned by others who’ve used Proactive that it eventually lost its effectiveness for them I can’t be anything but pleased with the product now. You can (sort of) see from the (tiny) pictures above the improvement Proactive has made to my complexion and overall confidence in myself. I’d like to say that Proactive also helped to improve my fashion sense as I no longer where the bright green Oscar the Grouch hat but, really, that’s just because my beloved knit has gone missing.

The Superfriends

First of all, no, not the Saturday morning cartoon from way back. Tonight's "Superfriends" is praise to my friends who worked their posteriors off with various chores around my house.

Thank you to Beth, Deborah, Steve, Lexi, Sierra and Alyssa for raking and bagging leaves and other debris in the yard.

Thanks to Tom and Ben for cleaning and repairing the gutters (additional kudos to Ben for hanging out on my roof to do it).

Thanks to John and Dave for using their plumbing expertise to fix my noisy toilet, delinquent bathroom sink and dubious kitchen sink. Not to mention draining the the water heater and restringing belligerent blinds.

In addition to the above tasks, with the help of the Superfriends, my garage is organized, the front screen door handle repaired, the light fixture in my bedroom repaired, the dining room light brighter, the corner pine tree cut back and my lilac trimmed to bush size. Not to mention the previous help with a leaking kitchen faucet, clogged dryer duct, stopped-up utility sink and leaky kitchen pipes.

It's always nice to have friends but oh so much more so when they're Superfriends.

Lame!

It's not even nine o'clock yet on a Friday night and I am ready to go to sleep. In fact, I'm one computer and a lamp short of being asleep. It wasn't so long ago that I couldn't sleep no matter how much time I tried devoting to it and this week it seems I can't get enough. As I've uttered about a dozen times to various coworkers: it's been a long week.

I know, logically, that one week can't be longer than the other because, by definition, a week is 7 days long. But some weeks just take more out of you than others. This was one of those weeks. As the clock inches nearer to nine, I'm not even sure I have the energy to stay up for Stargate: Atlantis which doesn't start for another hour.

How lame is that? (the being too sleepy to stay up part, not the bit about Stargate: Atlantis.)

With as tired as I am I hope I'm not coming down with something. Again. I have this overly ambitious immune system that likes to beat on perfectly healthy tissue -- you'd think that would mean that I'd get sick less often, right? Apparently it doesn't quite work that way. It just means that I'm supposed to get more sleep than I regularly do during a good week and makes the bad weeks that much worse for not being 100% healthy. Maybe that's what my body is currently trying to remind me. I really do need eight hours of sleep a night and the six and a half hours -- maybe -- that I get just isn't cutting it. Silly body trying to tell me what's good for us.

Anyway. It's lame but I think I'm off to set the VCR to record SG:A and then I'm going to get some, apparently, much-needed sleep.

Product Endorsement: Mr. Clean Eraser

If Superman were bald and squishy he would be the Mr. Clean Eraser. I seriously don't know if there's anything this marvel can't do. Well, I know of several things it can't do -- cut vegetables, roast marshmallows or fry eggs -- but there's very little cleaning-wise that it can't accomplish.

The Mr. Clean Eraser was part of a house-warming gift basket from my real estate agent. I'd actually forgotten that I had it hidden away under the kitchen sink. But, oh, wonder of wonders when I did manage to find it -- it's unstoppable!

Last night, as I wrestled with the dreaded "ring" around the bathroom tub I remembered the Eraser and used it. Boy, let me tell you. I didn't even realize how dirty the bathtub was until I took the Eraser to it's not-quite-white walls. Goop from enthusiastic shampoo bottles and leaky body washes that have refused to dislodge for the past several scourings disappeared with a few swipes of the Eraser. Caulk remnants -- from the shoddy job my house's previous owners must have done -- also vanished with the Eraser. As I used the Eraser to make tub stains a distant memory, I thought it would make a great Christmas prezzie for my nearest and dearest (surprise! if you're reading this).

The Eraser -- I believe it's name is actually "Magic Eraser" -- is also great to have on hand if any part of your home is ever dusted for fingerprints. After The Break-in, the front door (well, the screen door as I needed a new entry door) had black stuff all over it from where the nice police officer dusted for prints in hopes of catching the [insert appropriate derogatory term] who broke into my home. The perp was likely wearing gloves so the dust/ink from the finger printing kit did nothing, really, expect leave a big mess. A mess that stayed for several months as nothing I tried worked to clean it off. I used a scrubby and dish soap. I used Windex. I used bleach. Nothing worked. Then, one day, as I was looking for something else I discovered the Magic Eraser in its hiding place beneath the kitchen sink. Seriously. Like magic, with only a couple of swipes, the black stain disappeared from the front door. Like. Magic.

Just so you know, I'm not getting anything out of the Mr. Clean people for writing this. Just the satisfaction of letting everyone who reads The World According to Joy (both of you) that I found a great product and you should try it out.